0
Invented by the Jews in 1955, the number 0 was named for its discoverer, Zero Mostel. It was the tail end of the Great Armadillo Invasion of the 1950s when inventor, mental spelunker, episiotomy practitioner, gnome and cake frosting rosette Zero Mostel stubbed his toe exiting a theatre. On opening night of The Producers, an as yet unconceived film by Mostel, that Mostel fell, or more properly, inconvenienced his toe as he yelled "fire".
By making himself nonexistent, the plaintiff escaped further rocker panel damage by exclaiming, "Sayonara, butt face!" as he drove away from the canyon and environs. Thus, the quantity of zero was conceived. This opened the door for time machine technology, and now people are going all willynilly back and forth in time, confusing themselves and others.

“John Delorean had a magnificent chin and a dream...”
Zero also comes second on the hierarchy of numbers.
√ 0
The square root of zero is a smelt in a cancelled check. Blizzards form on the edges of sanctity as spirit formation anniversary music plays in the background. Large, non=negative integers reach into the shadows to gather driftwood as offerings.
Lollygag the spatula lovingly.
Gamma rays and quantum chromodynamics are filtered through √ 0 like a fine wine through cheesecloth. Explosive cars get hired least often.
When the Winnebagos assembled manically in the Plethora Suite, we knew it was time for plastique.
See Also
Numbers of Sanity: 
4  Zero/0  0.0001  0.167  Zero Point Nine Reccuring/0.9999999999999  One/1/First  Two/2/Second/No two  Three/Third  π/3.1415926535897932...  Four/Fourth  Five/5/Fifth  Six  Seven  Eight/8  8.386023  Nine/9  Ten  Eleven  16...16  42  43  45  57  61  64  71.8  88  91  A hundred/100  116  118  300  333  400  419  420  555  617  666  909  1111  1337  1973  1984  1987  1992  2000  2004  2006  2007  2008  2009  2012  2014  Over nine thousand/9001  10000  328742  104270865  13809827354  73020590879353  333333333333333  +9 trillion  +6 octillion  Googol  +43 duodecillion  Bunch of 1s  +999 Vigintillion  Babblion  Bajillion  Kajillion  Googolplex  Googolplexian  Infinity 
Numbers of Insanity: 
Infinity1  Bleen  Numbers of the Alphabet  Null  4 8 15 16 23 42  99 Red Balloons  Flargleflex  Igh  The number q  Zilch/Zrilch/Zkilcch  Googleplex  ω  υ  BANANA  18 19 20 
This page has received the blessing of The Great Gozimnot of Mathematics, and is therefore mathematically correct in all aspects. 
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