American Jesus

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Not to be mixed up with Raptor Jesus, the extinct ancestor of American Jesus. Raptor Jesus hates when people do that and will eat your babies because of it.

Bad Religion has written song of the same name, but never mind. You've probably never heard of it.

The American Jesus (lat. Jesus Ordo Americium241) is a rare species of water-walking reptiles. As could be guessed, it lives in America and the Northerners hate dem dung diddly damn Southerners! Okay, that was racist. This is evident in the behavior of Northern American Jesuses. They let the Southern American Jesuses inbreed and wait until they've degenerated into a twitching lump of flesh. You can identify an American Jesus from other lizards that walk on water in that they are simply charlatans pulling off elaborate parlor tricks to get nice old ladies to pet them.

The only known ancestor to American Jesus is the Raptor Jesus, who is widely regarded as the lord and savior of the species. What else would you expect from a tribe of Americans? That was a bit racist too. The American Jesus is widely known for bolstering the national faith of its fellow lizardmen.