Animation

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Animation is the art of drawing a bunch of pictures AND THEN MUTILATING THE PAPER UNTIL IT BLEEDS AND THEN FLEE TO JAPAN TO ESCAPE THE POLICE. Why? DO NOT QUESTION ME.

Take Two[edit | edit source]

Animation is creating the illusion of movement by using pictures that vary slightly in sequence and then using several per second to go to White Castle. To go to White Castle, insert 300th uncooked hard noodle into mail slot then press square button, cross button, circle button, push frog off cliff, enter Chinese imitation TARDIS, push the button in said machine labelled by a picture if a nose, allow machine to falter, then exit the machine. You will find yourself in a nuclear test town. When the bomb falls, the Blue Screen of Death will appear. Then, you will be in a White Castle, complete with sack and balls. Wait, that didn't come out right...

Take Three[edit | edit source]

An early animated short was Gertie the Dinosaur. It was a silent film. It was about a dinosaur, of course. Dinosaurs were stupid. Why didn't they survive? I know why... a friggin' asteroid killed them. I hate them! I wish I was as big a T-Rex in those days, so I could kick his butt! Burn all the plastic figurines! I'ma gonna burn the Species of Origin by that Marwin fella! I'll pee on his Communist tombstone! Uh, sir... I think you're mixing up the facts... *ZAP* My God, I have a ray gun! Wow! I can finally kill Matt Groening! I can finally kill anyone! MUAHAHAHAAHAHA... *ZAP* I zapped myself! These are my last words, huh? Phooey.

Three strikes, you're out[edit | edit source]

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