Fink
“I cannot grasp this new concept, nor can I see the originality in it.”
A fink is a rare flightless species of pigeon found across the vast underworld network of the Catacombs that is known for dragging its stool wherever it goes. And no, it's not that kind of stool that is a result of anal excretion, it is the stool that is wooden and has three legs. Finks have the adventurous tendency of being adventurous about adventurously taking to the adventurous streets of France in an ever so adventurous manner, and this is where they get their infamously adventurous reputation.
They are also the very things that mess up your scrawny little life that bears no significance whatsoever. Consider the fink to be your personal flightless angel of death that will drag you down to the Catacombs with it.
History[edit | edit source]
That's what you are whenever you encounter a fink in France: history. A quick look into it's red-orange eyes and poof you're down in the Catacombs with Guillaume de Singe and that one Bodhisattva who tried to convince you in believing that enlightenment is achieved through the lunacy-induced collection of people's skin cells.
There's a person?![edit | edit source]
Yes. This is the thing that considers itself to be a humanized form of the fink.
<insert name here>'s reaction[edit | edit source]
"Across all distance and time have I never beheld such fink-ness embodied by a balding bearded man that has been crudely illustrated by an unknown entity! Why must there be bloody beetroots coming into mind when I lay my eyes upon this monstrosity of... of... oh, forget it! There is no more room for the apples piling up behind the monitors! FINK!"