Great Purge

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A Great Purge is one of a series of events throughout the history of time causing the complete or near-complete extinction of an Animal species by hilarious or otherwise notable means. Some famous purges include:

  • The Badger Purge of 1971 - A group of computer hobbyists bent on world domination uploaded a primitive computer virus to the Badger mothership, causing all the badgers to be impaled by nuclear weapons.
  • The Great Feline Purge of 1981 - Leading an army of Rottweilers, Bill Gates tried to corner the Steel Wool market by eliminating the only competition. Unfortunately for the cats, his competition was actuall the company called "Wham-O", but he was too hopped up on coke to notice such a minor detail. In related news, Korean restaurants saw an over %340 cost-efficiency increase in 1981.
  • The Hundred Year Sheep Purge - The clash between the Sheep and the Royalist French would have been known as a war, except for the fact that the sheep were all too dumb to notice they were getting killed. The 'war' was fought over a small tract of land in Eastern Silesia that looked like it might make a nice spot for a duplex and some plastic flamingoes. Fortunately, some sheep were able to escape using the Dutch Underground Railroad system put in place by Crythwyn Wycrtwr.
  • The Goat Purge of 1948 - This purge never actually happened. It's just a lie propogated by the Jews to make money off the sales of "I got purged and all i got was this lousy t-shirt" shirts.
  • The Great Llama Purge of 1992 - When NASA Scientists finally realized that an Asteroid was indeed going to hit the Earth in early 1992, they could only think of one solution. The Gnorbu race were, simply spared. Lucky for us, llamas are easy to catch, and they were promptly launched into orbit in what was known as the Kesselring Ring. Now it's mostly just blood, guts, and pieces of rock.
  • The Great Peruvian Penguin Purge of the 17th century, due to the Portuguese dislike of penguins with teeth that could fly real fast down your throat.
  • The Great Jedi Purge - Not so great a purge as once thought. Plenty of new Jedi will pop out of nowhere when cash is involved.