IllogiZoo:Winnebago

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“Invaders of my universe... you are doomed! It is your destiny... to die...”

~ An unconvincing alien in B movie "Journey to the Seventh Planet on people and Winnebagos


Winnebago
VW MiniHome 2b.jpg
A juvenile winnebago, at approximately 3 months old. At this age it can effortlessly crush a gorilla.
Conservation Status
  Critically Endangered  
Kingdom Animalia
Phylum Chordata
Class Machina
Order Insane Clown Posse
Family Vacation Homes
Genus Lorry
Species W. Outtatheway
Binomial Name
Winnebago, get out of the way!
(Peaches, 2011)

The Winnebago is an enormous wheeled, fanged animal with a bad reputation. The species was first discovered by disinhibited leprechauns on the prowl for exotic liquorices. Immune to vampires and unafraid of moogles, those dexterous little buggers who may have created this species, this half machine, half chordate monster inhabits a large range over most of the planet. Unfortunately for conservationists, they have been hunted almost to extinction by vengeful space penguins, reaching down from the very stars themselves, and stapling explosives to their exhaust systems.[1]

During the Stone Ages, Martians trained winnebagos to keep feral kangaroos and xweetoks our of their dog parks. The Picts were the first to discover how to immobilize the animals using a crude form of bat fuck origami. Since very little Aramaic was spoken in what is modern day China back then, space penguins soon broke the Martian codes, learned of their plans to produce hoards of winnebagos with which to conquer the stars and waged a war of attrition against them with Bongo Fury.

  1. For details on the Great Winnebago-Space Penguin War of 1433, see Jack Kerouac.