Instant massaging
Instant Massaging is a device available on the new iPhones, accessed by hitting the number combination 867-5309, and then rotating the phone clockwise 90 degrees. Since the author of this article doesn't make enough money to buy a Big Mac once a month, he couldn't see for himself what this device does, so he asked the only person he knew that could tell him:
“What do you think it does, you idiot, mow the lawn?”
In conclusion, with all the hype about the iPhone, it's nice to know that there are still ingenious engineers out there, who are capable of sating our need for cellular phones that play movies and steal people's souls (take pictures), since this need is much more important than the second place World Hunger issue. Plus, the author of this article can't wait to get a job now and save up so that he can mow his lawn with an iPhone.