Laws of Stupidity
“The Laws of Stupidity are actually quite simple, all you must do is…”
“Shut up Ninestine! Everybody hates you because now they can't use the insult "You're the stupidest person in the whole wide world!"”
“Well it is true you know...”
“GET HIM!”
Alberto Ninestine[edit | edit source]
Alberto Ninestine is an "intellectually challenged" person that is in a coma right now because of an angry mob that started to try to kill him for reasons that I know but I will not tell you. He was the founder of the Laws of Stupidity and lives in Cheeseburg with his mother. They eat cheeseburgers every day, and that is why Alberto weighs 5,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 cheezeezies.
“*BUUUUUURP*”
The Great Law of Stupidity[edit | edit source]
The Great Law of Stupidity states something so obvious that even Captain Not Obvious knows about.
- S²=RSG-RG×S
Since you probably already know the meaning of this equation, we will not waste our time in telling you what it means.
The Other Law of Stupidity[edit | edit source]
If you think apples falling to the ground is weird, you are stupid.
“It's a bird! It's a plane!”
“It's an apple you idiot! According to my Laws of Stupidity —”
“Hey, it's that retard again! GET HIM!”
Pythetican Therum[edit | edit source]
- Stupid¹+Stupid²=Retarded³
This equation simply means that a stupid guy times a stupid guy times himself equals a retard times himself thrice, and that if you don't understand this, you suck.
“You can see the difference, that stupidity makes.”
How to Tell the Difference Between a Stupid Guy and a Normal Guy[edit | edit source]
- Stupid Guy: Doesn't know what Illogicopedia is
- Normal Guy: Does
- Stupid Guy: Doesn't know what Aid Epoc Igolli is
- Normal Guy: Does
- Stupid Guy: Has buck teeth
- Normal Guy: Doesn't
- Stupid Guy: Drools
- Normal Guy: Doesn't
- Stupid Guy: Sucks
- Normal Guy: Doesn't
A. E. Schneider[edit | edit source]
A. E. Schneider, unlike Alberto Ninestine, was not a retard. Also this guy didn't live in Cheeseburg, he lived in Hamburg, so he only ate hamburgers and he wasn't as fat. He only weighed 600,000,000,000,000 cheezeezies. A. E. Schneider was the co-founder of the laws of stupidity, but he knew that Alberto Ninestine was really stupid, so he started the Hates Ninestine Angry Mob Club on Facebook so that he would gain all the recognition.
Death of A. E. Schneider[edit | edit source]
A. E. Schneider died when Ninestine, finally out of his near-lethal coma, started the Hates Schneider Even More Angrier Mob Club, also on Facebook. He was killed when he was cornered at a dark alley in New York, after a chase around the world in 80 days. He went to Reno, Chicago, Fargo, Minnesota,Buffalo, Toronto, Winslow, Sarasota,Wichita, Tulsa, Ottawa, Oklahoma, Tampa, Panama, Mattawa, La Paloma,Bangor, Baltimore, Salvador, Amarillo, Tocopilla, Barranquilla, and Padilla, Boston, Charleston, Dayton, Louisiana, Washington, Houston, Kingston, Texarkana, Monterey, Ferriday, Santa Fe, Tallapoosa, Glen Rock, Black Rock, Little Rock, Oskaloosa, Tennessee, Hennessey, Chicopee, Spirit Lake, Grand Lake, Devil's Lake, Crater Lake, he's been everywhere, man. He's been everywhere, man. 'Cross the deserts bare, man. He's breathed the mountain air, man. Of travel, he's had his share, man. He's been everywhere.