Elements 112 to 118

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Elements 112 to 118 are some of the most unusual mysteries known to mankind (and, for that matter, James Hetfield and his manUNkind).

The elements are mostly solid, and only exist for a fraction of a second. In fact, entire planets made out of these elements have been found to vanish.

So, without further ado, let's get to the elements! (Wait, that's ado. What's going on?)

Some oganesson, hurtling through the LHC at 99.92% the speed of light. You know, this is what takes your hair straight out.

112: Copernicium[edit | edit source]

This element is found in ice cream. Most notably in vanilla ice cream. It was discovered by a scientist who wanted to find a way to make his freezer work. On his desk the next morning was a slab of unusual metal, malleable and greenish-silver. There was a note saying 'Your freezer? Done. Also, it's copernicium. -The Element Fairy'

Amazed by this sudden discovery, he took it to the lab, only to find that it had disappeared from nuclear decay, and that the lab was now radioactive. Shrugging, he headed off to the shops.

113: Nihonium[edit | edit source]

Nihonium, as its name suggests, was found in Ultra Japan, in a top-secret mining sector. The government were performing experiments to see whether they could combine other high-powered elements like americium and plutonium to create the world's best smoke detector, which used time travel to put out fires before they even started.

114: Flerovium[edit | edit source]

Flerovium, like copernicium, somehow also appeared by magic. Nobody knows who or what was involved in the creation of this wonder element. It doesn't fix freezers, though. It seems that it was designed as a social justice weapon, as swallowing it would immediately kill the wage gap, create public safe spaces, and create a magical clone army of Zoe Quinn.

Thus far, none of it has worked.

115: Moscovium[edit | edit source]

Moscovium was not discovered in Moscow. It was discovered as an active ingredient in some toothpastes. According to manufacturers, the moscovium sharpens your teeth. It does not, however, involve time travel, which the next version is planning to have, as it will fight cavities before they even start to happen from tooth decay.

Moscovium is also found in some kinds of industrial-grade sjink.

116: Livermorium[edit | edit source]

Found in lightbulbs. The casing of the filament was developed by Samsung in the early 2000s as a way to integrate computer technology with lightbulbs, so that they can be set from an exterior home computer/server/other such device, and can control the light amount (as well as being set as per time of day) and heat, so that the maximum possible amount of energy is saved. However, this is a Samsung product, therefore caution must be exercised when using it. APPLE MASTER RACE SELF HIGH-FIVE

That's just the risk you take.

117: Tennessine[edit | edit source]

Tennessine has not had a detected use yet. Some believe that, because it is named after Tennessee, that it somehow acts as a pill to cure redneckism, which is a classified disease by the American Medical Registry. It has been made into medicine, by mixing 5 grams of tennessine with 10 grams of clay and 3 grams of chalk powder, and some betel leaf if you can get your hands on it, and then the instruction for the redneck is simply to swallow, or to place in their trailer.

118: Oganesson[edit | edit source]

By far the most researched of this group of mysterious elements, oganesson is found naturally in some mineral clusters. A cluster of aggregate marble with some platinum and rare gemstones, mined in Argentina and researched at a laboratory in Chicago, was found to contain a few atoms of oganesson. A solid bar of oganesson, approximately 7x10 centimetres, but weighs 2 kg due to its density, was synthesised in the same lab. Oganesson is not yet sold, but is planned to be put on the market as a solution to prevent hair loss.

It is not to be confused with ununoctium.

Group # 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18
Period
1 1 H
hydrogen

0 n
neutronium
Illogicopedian Elements

2 He
helium
2 3 Li
lithium
4 Be
beryllium

5 B
boron
6 C
carbon
7 N
nitrogen
8 O
oxygen
9 F
fluorine
10 Ne
neon
3 11 Na
sodium
12 Mg
magnesium

13 Al
aluminium
14 Si
silicon
15 P
phosphorus
16 S
sulfur
17 Cl
chlorine
18 Ar
argon
4 19 K
potassium
20 Ca
calcium
21 Sc
scandium
22 Ti
titanium
23 V
vanadium
24 Cr
chromium
25 Mn
manganese
26 Fe
iron
27 Co
cobalt
28 Ni
nickel
29 Cu
copper
30 Zn
zinc
31 Ga
gallium
32 Ge
germanium
33 As
arsenic
34 Se
selenium
35 Br
bromine
36 Kr
krypton
5 37 Rb
rubidium
38 Sr
strontium
39 Y
yttrium
40 Zr
zirconium
41 Nb
niobium
42 Mo
molybdenum
43 Tc
technetium
44 Ru
ruthenium
45 Rh
rhodium
46 Pd
palladium
47 Ag
silver
48 Cd
cadmium
49 In
indium
50 Sn
tin
51 Sb
Antimony
52 Te
tellurium
53 I
iodine
54 Xe
Xenon
6 55 Cs
caesium
56 Ba
barium
*
Lanthanoids
72 Hf
hafnium
73 Ta
tantalum
74 W
tungsten
75 Re
rhenium
76 Os
osmium
77 Ir
iridium
78 Pt
platinum
79 Au
gold
80 Hg
Mercury
81 Tl
Thallium
82 Pb
lead
83 Bi
bismuth
84 Po
polonium
85 At
astatine
86 Rn
radon
7 87 Fr
francium
88 Ra
radium
**
Actinoids
104 Rf
rutherfordium
105 Db
dubnium
106 Sg
seaborgium
107 Bh
bohrium
108 Hs
hassium
109 Mt
meitnerium
110 Ds
darmstadtium
111 Rg
roentgenium
112 Cn
copernicium
113 Nh
nihonium
114 Fl
flerovium
115 Mc
moscovium
116 Lv
livermorium
117 Ts
tennessine
118 Og
oganesson
* Lanthanoids 57 La
lanthanum
58 Ce
cerium
59 Pr
praseodymium
60 Nd
neodymium
61 Pm
promethium
62 Sm
samarium
63 Eu
europium
64 Gd
gadolinium
65 Tb
terbium
66 Dy
dysprosium
67 Ho
holmium
68 Er
erbium
69 Tm
thulium
70 Yb
ytterbium
71 Lu
lutetium
** Actinoids 89 Ac
actinium
90 Th
thorium
91 Pa
protactinium
92 U
uranium
93 Np
neptunium
94 Pu
plutonium
95 Am
americium
96 Cm
curium
97 Bk
berkelium
98 Cf
californium
99 Es
einsteinium
100 Fm
fermium
101 Md
mendelevium
102 No
nobelium
103 Lr
lawrencium