The Diaries of Scientist Harold Greenburg

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April 26 2008[edit | edit source]

I had just found the answer why an apple falls off a tree. Bill said we'd already discovered that but I didn't listen to him. Now I'm thinking about studying the effects different substances has on different animals. I may study this next week.

April 28 2008[edit | edit source]

I'm going to start the experiment tomorrow! Isn't it great! I'm so excited about it. This is going to be a short entry because I have to become a goat.

April 29 2008[edit | edit source]

I'm in the lab. I'm going to make some notes. My first test subject is a lab rat:

  • Milk (No effect)
  • Orange Juice (No effect)
  • Coke (More energetic)
  • Pot (High)
  • Beer (Slur in words)
  • Kerosene + Match (Holy ****, 911! 911!)

Today didn't go well. I ended up blowing up half of the lab and my test subject. Hopefully I'll have a new subject tomorrow. And a new lab.