The Greatest Inventions of Mankind
These are the things that are symbols of Mankind's triumph. There are currently 13 of them, but the list is ever growing, as more and more candidates are submitted to the Awesomenestlist Things in the World Committee.
- Microwave lights. Oh yes, watch your food as it cooks! Freakin' awesome.
- Fish Fingers. In these times of economic hardship, thank the Lord for Captain Birdseye and his cheap, questionably gritty foods.
- The triangle. If you didn't get to play an instrument in the school play, you'd be cheesed off, wouldn't you? Thanks to the triangle, the simplest instrument ever, you can join a rock band and even start up a record label without having to learn music notation.
- Sticks and chickens, without which there would be no "What's brown and sticky?" or even an animal to cross the road.
- Buttocks. Where would we be without our backsides? Well, we certainly wouldn't be out on our arses...
- AOL CDs. So many possibilities! I just use them as free drinks coasters.
- Sarcasm detector. Useful for anybody who is taking a trip to London or Slough.
- Chocolate covered peanuts. You thought peanuts couldn't get any better? Well they just did! Get chocolate all over your face in a way you never thought possible.
- Mousepads. They are a-freaking-mazing, and without it we'd have nothing to win for free from radio stations.
- Toilets. Now our dogs can get water whenever they need it.
- Your Right Hand. Your Right Hand is there for you, and whenever you're feeling down, your right hand will rocket you right back up! Unless you're a lefty, in which case, it's your left hand.
- Doorknobs. Imagine having doors... but not being able to open them! It would be similar to torture. Opening doors is one big provider of entertainment thanks to doorknobs.
- Electric Scales - Used to measure one's weight, you can program them to lower your weight by up to twenty pounds. They are currently outselling propane scales by nearly 8:1.
- Ginsu Knife - The Ron Popeil invention that once had become a television ad staple, even if really can't cut as well as you've seen it on TV.
With more amazing achievements found to be amazing every day, surely this list will grow and grow.
| Magnificent Madness
This article was one of the Top Ten Articles of 2009.