Wiki Terms and Conditions revision twenty seven (November 6 2008):
- By creating a wiki on Wikia's servers, contributing to such a wiki or associated projects you:
- Officially agree to work for Wikia for free.
- Have no rights. Not a sausage. You don't even have the rights to the clothes you are standing in when you sign up to Wikia.
- Wikia reserve the right to mangle and deface our wikis beyond all recognition and overrule the wishes any individual community regardless of what is morally right.
- All communities are treated with equal contempt, except Uncyclopedia. If Uncyclopedia were to leave, we'd be screwed, so don't even think about it, mush. We can crush you with our high powered lawyers and GFDL license, under which we can do anything we please.
- Wikia do not care what you think, though we will pretend to take your opinion on board just to make you feel special.
- We reserve the right to go back on all 'promises' and revert any edits you make. Wikia know what is best for every one of our 1,000,001 wikis even though our administrators have visited just three of them.
- Any wiki found not to be complying with our vision of what a wiki should look like will have their IP tracked. A Wikia drone with a large vocabulary but low wit will come round to the house/flat/rubbish bin you call home and crush you with legal jargon.
- You are required to make a monthly donation to fund the servers. Please make all cheques out to:
- Jimbo Wales,
- Island in middle of Pacific Ocean,
- Somewhere the tax men can't find him
- And definitely not Monaco
- All Wikia staff must undergo a humorectomy, removing all traces of a sense of humour and other such human character traits.
- Wikia staff (drones) are employed to do our bidding and if you should encounter one, may God have mercy on you.
- Wikia staff have a chip implanted in their head which limits them to the following stock phrases:
- "I apologise if you misunderstood, but I am in charge here"
- "That may well be your opinion, but ours is the one that matters"
- "I have answered this before. Please fruitlessly search the forums for hours before you realise I made the comment on an extremely small and insignificant wiki somewhere on the outskirts of the server only accessed by computers in the hamlet of Townsville, Kerguelen"
- Wikia staff can meddle in your business all they like. They work on behalf of the Overlords, who will delete your wiki in a second's notice and deny any knowledge of your site ever existing.
- Wikia - You must read and agree to the above terms and conditions before clicking this link.
- New Monaco - You must never speak ill of the Mighty Monaco.
- Wikia Spotlight - Required to be placed on every single Wikia page that ever existed. You are not eligible for spotlight if you do not use the Mighty Monaco.
- Wikia Requests - The huge gate at the front of Wikia HQ, guarded by Police with dogs.