Zombie plan

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In case of a real extended zombie-related apocalypse threatening this web site specifically, see The Illogicopedian Zombie Plan.

A zombie plan is a set of procedures intended to be implemented in the event of a zombie virus related apocalypse. The purpose of a zombie plan may vary according to an individual's goals in life (or possibly undeath) but a common theme in most zombie plans is the survival of one or more humans in their pre-existing, living, non-zombified and undevoured mode of existence. Recent polls indicate that most Americans do not wish to become zombies. However, few people have actually formulated plans to help them avoid becoming zombies in the event of a zombie virus outbreak. Professional and academic zombieologists study zombies and the possibility of a zombie apocalypse in order to develop well-researched and documented zombie plans. In addition to basic survival, other additional goals are also undertaken by some zombie plans such as containing the spread of the zombie virus, developing a cure for the zombie virus, maintaining civil order or preserving physical property against possible damage.

Another goal that is usually (but not always) secondary in most zombie plans is the killing of as many zombies as possible. Critics of these plans have argued that this shows a logical inconsistency because since zombies are already dead, and what is dead cannot be killed, it follows that zombies cannot be killed. However, this line of argument seems to be contradicted by actual experience because it has been shown that zombies can indeed be killed by being shot in the head or decapitated.

A woman in Louisiana claims to have developed a way to use Voodoo zombies to combat virus-based zombies, utilizing a "divide and conquer" strategy. Some have speculated that trained zombies could one day be reintegrated into everyday human society. There are even some rare individuals who have argued that the zombie lifestyle is actually preferable to human society in it's present form. These people have created various alternative zombie plans which involve exposing themselves to the zombie virus and in some cases, even intentionally spreading the zombie virus to others against their will. These views and endeavors have been largely rejected by mainstream zombieologists who view zombie outbreaks as a natural disaster which humanity must use science to combat. Zombies are regarded as nonpersons which are dangerous and thus worthy only of destruction.

Recent developments using computer technology[edit | edit source]

ROMERO, a computer system developed at MIT is an expert system dedicated to evaluating the relative feasibility of various zombie plans. It determined based on a dataset of the 500 most common zombie plans that the best possible course of action in the event of a zombie apocalypse is to kidnap Max Brooks, because he will know what to do.

See also[edit | edit source]