A ridiculously long article about the particularly un-interesting life of a guy called Joe who told me his life story once

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Hello, silly person who is foolish enough to begin reading this, blissfully unaware that the completion of this article will consume the rest of your day. For, you see, my time is worthless, and so I can spend it writing this stupid thing instead of doing whatever you'd be doing if you weren't reading this. And it's all your fault, you noobcake.

For my newest failed article, I will write an autabrigahpy autobrigaophy diary of Joe's life. Who is Joe, I hear you exclaim so loudly? Well, Joe is this guy who I talked to once on the bus, and he was really interesting! He told me his life story, and about how he became the world's strongest billionaire just by using a new product from his website for only £299.95! Oh, he was interesting.

Early life[edit | edit source]

Joe was born in Hell, where he was raised by cats until the age of 8. After being raised by cats, he didn't know anything about humans, so he set out to destroy all humans. He failed miserably, but chose not to give up because people who give up are called flarb-squashers, and if you get called that you have no hope of ever getting a job as the Secondary Accountant of Direct Proportion Management for Integrated Standard Form Appliances, which is what every kid wants to do.

Unfortunately, his failure caused him to commit suicide, but he came mysteriously back to life. I don't know how... let's just say a wizard did it. Then, he defeated Darth Vader twice and went home for some coffee.

Mid-life[edit | edit source]

CRISIS CRISIS CRISIS11111

Later life[edit | edit source]

Young Joe developed a sexism habit as heh it his 60s, which left undiscovered soon spread to his organs and within months had developed into full blown old-style racism. Unable to save him doctors oculd only watch on as he aesphyxiated to death trying to get his klan hood over his head.

Other info[edit | edit source]

Nope. He's a fictional character.