An article whose existence is only justified because it brings the current article count up to 6,740
First, there is no such thing as a real Spiderman. If you see a Spiderman, do not panic, but proceed to the nearest dispensary, where you will be given a prophylactic dose of anti-psychotics and Dramamine. Giant insects will tend to your physical needs, and chaplains are available during the dark night of the soul. Actuarial tables will be disregarded for the purposes of this conversation.