IllogiNews:Blogosphere gives birth to bowl of oatmeal
This article is part of IllogiNews, your sauce for chips and sausages. |
September 25, 2010
INTERWEBS - The blogosphere has become ever more sticky this afternoon as it gave birth to its first child, a bowl of slightly-undercooked oatmeal which was named Ronald. He was born at one pound two ounces, a hefty size for a bowl of oatmeal. This event was unexpected, so domain hosts were not prepared for the small amounts of oatmeal that began to ooze out of their servers.
"None of us saw it coming. We knew she had been swelling up like crazy, but we thought it was normal. Apparently we failed to notice the excessive growing around the belly region." said internet expert, Jimbo Wales. "Now we just need Wikia to take over the blogosphere and steal that baby."
For some, this has been been a monumental part of internet history. Take, for example, the numerous amounts of Facebook users who made a fan page for the newborn oatmeal, which quickly gained 234,765 fans; and the Internet Oatmeal Source, which expressed its appreciation by making a blog post. Others, however, have taken this with negative light.
"That oatmeal fried my server network. And I had to get my workers to lick it all up." said some server host.
According to experts, we should be seeing more children spewing out of the blogosphere at a nearly exponential rate. Many are surprised that we haven't seen some offspring before today. Some such experts have begun making cribs for the expected new arrivals.
"I'm getting excited. Since I can never get a woman due to my nerdy career choice, this will be my one opportunity to raise a baby that is very similar to me," says one expert. "Let's just hope the next one is a boy."
One question, however, still remains: Who got the blogosphere pregnant?
The answer: nobody knows. It was probably Bcbkye.