IllogiNews:Horoscopes for April, 2021
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This article is part of IllogiNews, your sauce for chips and sausages. |
What's with the the horoscopes stopping? Were they banned or something? Will I be cursed for eternity for doing this? I hope not. Anyways. Horoscopes.
- Aries: They're adding something to Minecraft soon that you'd probably like.
- Taurus: If you own at least 1 bovine, you should probably get security cameras installed.
- Gemini: :inimeG
- Cancer: No longer will you be made fun of for your astrological sign sharing a name with a life-threatening disease. This is the era of the crab rave.
- Leo: fire lion
- Virgo: People will confuse you for a Scorpio.
- Libra: It's time to tip the scales.
- Scorpio: People will confuse you for a Virgo.
- Ophiuchus: You must really, really care about being up-to-date.
- Saggitarius: Honestly, you probably know your future better than we ever could.
- Capricorn: The Minecraft thing again, but... like... with more water?
- Aquarius: It begins soon.
- Pisces: Time's running out.