Allegheny Avenue

Allegheny Avenue is an area in Philly where all the Florida men somehow end up and wave to people as they drive through on your way to a WaWa🦆 for Tastykakes at 3:00am and sometimes even walk up to your car and try to have a conversation with you. This area is also known as the Safari by some. If you stay a while, you will be able to witness alien rituals seen nowhere else on Earth. One of the rituals involves a male pinching a female’s neck, both unmoving and completely still, this is their mating ritual. Don’t worry, it gets weirder. On the intersection of Kensington and Allegheny is the heart of alien sightings on the east coast, only second to Disneyworld in Florida. The funniest, brutalist and weirdest shit happens here. There was this one “human male”, people thought he was a flasher because he wore this coat and said to people “have you ever seen and anteater in Philly?” Then he opens his coat to reveal pockets full of Ants the Anteater Beanie Baby and wearing a tank top and boxer shorts underneath.