Beep Beep Lettuce
Bep Bep Lettuc is an edible type of Lettuce used to create a spell to make all traffic dissappear. One must do a few things to achieve this spell.
Traffic Dissappearance Spell
- Boil the Bep Bep Lettuc (BBL) for 20 minutes.
- Get a Green Lighter (It cannot be any other colour, especially not yellow, as yellow is not a good toaster!)
- Set HALF of the Bep Bep Lettuc on fire.
- Blow out the fire, and pour blue food dye on the Bep Bep Lettuc side that is not burnt, and red on the side that is.
- Attach the Bep Bep Lettuc on top of your car, and do not mind if the dye starts to drain, but attach the Beep Beep Lettuce securely.
- Sit in your car and wait until in a traffic jam.
- Begin screaming and raging in your car for 10 seconds, almost like you are having a fit.
- Suddenly slam your hand onto your car horn twice in quick succession (i.e. In a 'Bep Bep' fashion) do not allow a long horn to sound (i.e. Bep)
- Let out a loud sigh
- Slam your foot onto the accelerator.
- Watch as all the cars are moved and crushed emotionally by this simple spell.
NOTE: This spell is smiled upon and even legal in some places.
Bep Bep Lettucs are not available in any illegal stores, but can be found on the black market. One place you can obtain these lettucs is: The bad part of town, my backyard
If you or someone you know is using Bep Bep Lettuc, please ring 1800-555-666 to get rid of your addiction, or call 1300-555-777 to notify the BIBLE (Bureau of Investigations into Beep Lettuce Exploitation).
In the event of a Beep Beep Lettuce Emergency (BBLE), please ring the Police and Ambulance for Emergency Assistance. Beep Beep Lettuce is a POISONOUS SUBSTANCE - DO NOT CONSUME.
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~ Nathaniel R. Froud (talk) 08:16, 5 April 2017 (UTC)