Flat Earth
I think you know who we are, and if you don't you better well start learning or else nothing you've learned in Geography will matter anyless than it doesn't already. And since we're doing introductions we might as well say that we're the Spherical Society of Spheres and other Shapes that the Earth Is and Isn't (SSSSII for short, and even shorter S4I2[1]). If you've ever heard the unfounded and untrue rumors of the Earth's supposedly inherent flatness, I'm here to tell you that we're the bright and brave youngsters who'll set you straight. We're the reason why everyone thinks, excuse me, knows the Earth is a boring old sphere and not the flat beauty that it actually isn't, and we'll keep it that way forever thank you very much. Never mind the belligerent bellends who say the Earth is flat, that the flatness and perfect circulatory discus shape of the Earth is a holy reflection of the true Monad upon the flawed physical. Nonsense. The Earth is a sphere, for we have the science of the Archons to tell you the truth. And our truth is the only truth if you still want to eat your vegetables without using a straw you fag.
Now, the demiurge is the only urge children.
What totally happened[edit | edit source]
This is the part of the lesson where we teach you, the spunky reader (with the spunk crusted keyboard) whose eyes cross one line to the next breathless at the density of words and the inanity of our verbulatory. No, that's not a rhetorical trick to veil the Earth's flatness to you young sprogs, we're preaching the one true gospel, us Sphere-Earthers are, nevermind those foolish rumors that the light of the Aeons are the real Sun, and that the false sun is a squishy brain trick of the Demiurge to hide the metaphysical from the physical. There's no such thing as the Demiurge! There is no world of perfect forms where the one true Monad awaits for Man to rejoin with SOPHIA in perfect male/female duality, thereby freeing our chained minds from our mortal coil! It's just a charlaten trick. Put your flawed faith in us, the friendly "scientists", the friendly "geography teachers", the friendly "judges" and "police". We're the real heroes! Trust us![2] Anyone who tells you the TRUTH OF THE GNOSIS is but an illusion of the mind.
You see, the Demiurge impressed upon Earth his mighty forms like an artist molds his clay. Oh, sorry, you're not ready for the Initiation of the Damned yet, we'll have to give you the scientific version of events, the only real events there are, foolish sprogs! The Earth was just a spherical rock that's spherical 'cus of silly old gravity, a totally real scientific concept and definitely not the Demiurge dragging our ethereal forms into the abyss in his perverted hatelust of Gnosis.[3] Just read what your textbooks say, don't read those obviously unscrupulous blogs, despite the fact they CONTAIN THE KNOWLEDGE THAT IS THE ONE KNOWLEDGE OF THE MONAD. Nothing but lies, all of them. Now please, close your eyes, our secret network of professional deceivers aren't wiping your brain clean of the shards of SOPHIA left from her arrogance. And not only is the Earth a sphere, the stars are spheres too, spheres of hot gas, the planets (not at all shadows of the ANCIENT AEONS from the fifth dimension, our totally unbiased satellites would have seen them by now), everything is a sphere. The universe, a sphere, a ball. Yes, the physical world, the ONLY world, a ball. God, these fucking idiots will eat anything up, next, we'll get them to believe that the ABSOLUTE for WHOM THERE IS NO ABOVE is just a myth.
Oops! You weren't supposed to hear that bit of, uh, colloquial commentary. Us SLAVES OF THE ARCHONS toil endlessly to bring you the truth, unfiltered from any waning influence of the MONAD upon this Physical Realm that which nothing exists but the PHYSICAL REALM.
What didn't happen at all[edit | edit source]
In the unending void of spacetime/psionic realm there ISN'T the source, the GODHEAD of which our minds AREN'T fragments of the Pleroma longsince NOT buried by the DEMIRUGE who TOTALLY ISN'T REAL GUYS L.O.L. The Demiurge, who ISN'T real, DIDN'T create the world in the shape of the kidney stone of Baal-Gaad, but the last rays of the MESSIAH who WASN'T sent as the last emmissary of the TRUE LIGHT FOR WHOM ILLUSIONS ARE BUT EGGSHELLS UPON THE RADIANT MONAD, DIDN'T reform the Earth into a disc shape, the final act of mercy upon the world who crucified him for not bending his knees to the wickedness of the FALSE GOD. This is, of course, completely unreal, a fabrication invented by people for WHOM THE MONAD IS THE ONE TRUE GODHEAD, which is like, totally fake and not at all real. Posers.
Footsienotes[edit | edit source]
- ↑ "Jesus, now I have to learn chemistry too," you would say on account of your complete lack of good matters and pink matter in your liquid noggin.
- ↑ Unfortunate rumors that we, S4I2, worship the blood-gorged phallus of the chief Archon whose name IS Yaldabaoth, are nothing but spiritual lies. There is only the material, now consume our propaganda like a lady of the night at the local jizz spigot.
- ↑ For whom Gnosis is not Gnosis but the faint impression of SOMETHING GREATER that the physical cannot support.