Germs

Germs, contrary to popular belief, did not originate in Germany. They actually came from Latvia. Germs come in many sizes and flavors and are widely held to be responsible for step-dancing.

How Big is a Germ?

The size of a germ varies from the size of an automobile to the size of an atom. Germs as big as telephones have been reported, however, as well as several species as big as automobiles. There also are species as big as atoms.

Germ Species As Big as Telephones

Germs come in many sizes.

Germs Were Invented in 1066 in Alaska by Several Scientists in Exile

Contrary to popular belief, there are no germ species as big as automobiles. The largest germs have been reported to be only two meters in diameter one way, twelve in another way.

Step-Dancing

Napoleon Bonaparte is famous for having contracted the first germ in 702 AD. He immediately began step-dancing.

How Big is a Germ?

It depends. While your average household germ may only be about as big as an elephant, there are several variations that you cannot see. Their size can only be deduced from mathematical formulae, such as the Pigmy-Rhino-Einsteinian-Rhesus Equation, as follows:

4x + 5x - 2x + 62 = 12y - 7n + 62 = dsafase24352fvg, where x stands for germ size, y stands for germ size, n stands for the color of the germ, and the other variables are now obsolete and are no longer used by mathematicians.

Bacteria, The Germ's Evil Cousin

While the germ is a relatively peaceful being, bacteria have been known to spread square-dancing. As a result they are highly feared, and several strains have appeared which cause people to do the cha-cha.

Germ Flavors

Germs come in several flavors.

Chicken

Germs come in chicken flavors.

Alfalfa

Germs come in alfalfa flavors.

Peanut

And germs come in walnut flavors.