PAPERS ARE EVIL. Everyone wants to get rid of papers. So, this article will teach you how to finally destroy!!!!
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1: Crumple the paper.
2: Step on the crumpled paper and smear it forcefully across the ground.
3: Throw the now rather smudged and creased ball of paper out the window. Then dive out the window to retreave it. Repeat this step 5 times.
4: Unfold the paper and soak it in water.
5: When the paper dries, fry or boil it in a pot/pan. Some people like to fry it while some like to boil it (it is rumoured some way out folks like to smoke it). Make sure the paper reaches over 450 degrees because that's it's burning point.
6: Rip the paper into STRIPS. No tiny pieces. STRIPS. Then tease the strips - a strip tease!
7: Blend the paper on "High" in the blender.
8: When the paper is shredded put it on a flat surface and hammer the paper.
7: Once again, soak the paper.
9: When the paper is dry, you may finally throw it in the trash. It has gotten all the torture it needs before it retires.
- If you like the paper and it is your friend, save it forever.
- Doing this on too many papers will make the rest attack you and run away to an owner that will take good care of the papers.