IllogiNews:Man caught existing

This article is part of IllogiNews, your sauce for chips and sausages.

Today a man was caught existing, the man didn't want to talk to us and was quoted saying "I'm just trying to live my life, so what if I want to exist? I feel like I have a right to do that." He was later found existing with another exister, they were reported talking about sports and coffee, which can only be done and drank respectively by a person who exists. We interrogated people on the matter, with some of them defending him, some of them questioning the fact that we also exist, and also one man who squawked like a pidgeon and stole a french fry from someone. We contacted the man in question asking if he would say a word on our show, however he said that he had to go to the store today so maybe next time. Either way, this has been IllogiNews, more coverage as this story develops.

UPDATE: As of Octodest 2019, he is still existing! UPDATE: As of Octodest 2020, he is still existing! Man was Questiond as he has been existing for 2 years man said "Squawk" as we have turned him to pigeon. AND IF U READ DIS WE MAKE U PIGEON