IllogiNews:Massive Labor Strike Overwhels City

This article is part of IllogiNews, your sauce for chips and sausages.

10/18/10

San Francisco, California, United States

A labor strike has put the city of San Francisco on edge for the last three weeks. Simply put, women are refusing to give birth.

One doctor said, "It's the strangest fad I've ever seen."

It all started in mid-September when a local made-for-TV-movie was aired on San Francisco's local CBS affiliate. It was about Meghan, a teenage girl who was so afraid to give birth, she "held her baby in" until it was five years old and she just couldn't keep it in anymore. The realism of this movie was obviously questioned by many but, the super-gullible believed it, and have started to do what is now known as "anti-birthing". Though most doctors agreed that there is no way a mother could prevent labor, it seems many have.

Not only that, but they have taken the city by storm, protesting birth at local baby boutiques and maternity wear stores.

One local anti-birther had this to say to all mothers planning to go through labor, "Believe me, guys say I'm hotter now that I'm gon' be pregnant foreva'. Mmmhhhmmm. You got a husband tellin' you he wants his baby? Well hell naw. You gon' get a lot more guys wantin' some of yo' bod' now. 'das right. I mean seriously-" The interview was cut short as a noticeable head appeared from the woman's pants.

Yes. Even the most strong-willed anti-birthers will inevitably be induced into labor. The longest running record so far is about a week and a half, but, they are still protesting, and many claim to be pregnant again and are waiting out their nine month "preparation" period.