Proverbs of confoosus
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"Tis an unwise thing for men to shit whilst standing up" - 1776 from WIT UPON A MOUNTAIN
Confoosus was a Chinese scholar, a learned man and polyglot, who, in 1200 bc became the first man to produce pure gold wisdom from his brain.
"An object falls and bounces. A brick dropped from the top of a skyscraper does not bounce" - From SHREWD OBSERVATIONS AND WIT 1555
"Never eat what you find on the ground" - From WIT AND LORE 1277
"A wine drinker behaves as if he is impersonating the figure of a drunken squire"
- ↑ The amalgamated farts of Monsieur Mooo