Quack cocaine is a new type of cocaine, often taken by ducks, swans and geese, after a foolish drug dealer threw large amounts of cocaine into the Potomac River. It was spotted by DEA and EPA officials, after a cloud of crystal white substance covered a large area of the river. The ducks spotted within this area were all upside-down, strangely hopping on one foot, or making extremely lengthy quack noises.
Local, national and even international drug dealers have taken advantage of this error, by selling 'coke ducks', 'quackingly amazing', 'crack 'n' quack' and 'duck and cocaine'. The authorities simply describe it as 'quack cocaine' and have as thus warned users that it is 5x more potent than standard crack.