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Fetch the cobweb from the back of the throat, there was an old lady who swallowed a fly. A fly baked in asbestos over a bunsen burner. Perhaps she'll die. Perhaps she'll get diarhea.

Love vs. Diarhea?[edit]

Somebody once made a comparison between loneliness and diarhea. It didn't make much sense. It probably only makes sense when your brain is floating in a toilet bowl.

Staring at a square, all the livelong day[edit]

With occasional pauses to stare at triangle. With occasional (meno)pauses to stare at triangle.

Anyway, on to the topic of this artikle: Riff-Raff. The Riff-Raff is a rare cousin of the Giraffe. Riff-Raffs are highly endangered. In fact, they don't exist at all. They only exist in this article. If this article was deleted, they'd be extinct.

This reminds me of a kitchen appliance I once brutally raped[edit]

I was covered with a black cloth. It was deemed unsuitable for viewing. The elevator that carried me a total of four feet.

Or was it.


I'm on a roll...but goodness knows...(dramatic backing vocalists). Red, white, red, white. And so it goes.

A brief voyage into the realm of the cliche (note for future editors: please put apicture of a cliche on a piece of paper next to this one, in the event that it is ever printed {Population explosion! Riff-Raff expansion! Global warming!}

Insert A: Image of crayon up the nose of Ron Paul[edit]

A waterproof crayon. Taking pictures of the inside of Ron Paul's nose! Broadcast during the closing credits!

Kangaroo? But....but...but....whatever happened to my prime source of knowledge?[edit]

. . . . . . .

I was going to write some sort of profound statement here.

. . .

. .

. .

Cataclysmic event; walnut

Immerse yourself in the pan )of course(

Insert B: A short story with no moral (condemnity international)[edit]

A man wearing chopines at the bottom of a well.

....ALL you need in life is a roof over your head. If you don't get one, there's always the lid of a...coffin? Or a coffee mud, if you can fit inside one. Or both. They're essentially the same thing, aren't they?

Riff-Raff hunters, assemble! Bring forth your biggest guns that can fit in your lidded suitcases, and shine up your future trophy sweaters!

Sitting Sideways At Chinese Buffets[edit]

If you eat the orange sezchwan chicken with the peanuts, then your already lost.