Santa rapes kids!

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Ho Ho Ho, little Patricia. Looks like you’re on the naughty list. I know you’re only 9, but let’s do this anyway. You Ho Ho Hoe. OH OH OH YES I LOVE YOU! OH OH YES! HARDER DADDY! HARDER!

What’s all that sound? OH NO MY BABY! SANTA, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!

Oh no… MAKE A RUN FOR IT!

Santa was then shot 23 times. That’s why Christmas doesn't exist anymore, kids!