Slow death of a gas guzzler

Oh hi. My name is Bob, and I'm gonna tell you a tale that could change your life.

Jamie at your service.

There was this weird guy called Jamie who filled jars with his fart and screwed lightbulbs to various bodily orifices. One day he felt the Transformation. Energy was coursing in each of his veins, his ass was red with the esctatic experience, and then came a silent but sure puff of gas...the experience killing him but leaving him The Transformed One, his ghost vanishing away into the cold winter air.

The End

One day I also hope to be able *POOF* *GAAAHHHHH*--