Watermelon

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Did you know that an entire melon could be made of water? Me neither! Not until I found out about the watermelon.

Water[edit | edit source]

A fluid substance, that can be confined by a glass, is called water. If you can drink it, its probably also water. Unless its soda. But most likely, its water. Or beer.

This substance called water, that can be confined by a glass, can also be confined by a cup. Or a spoon in small doses. But the grandest of all is the mighty melon. Like a bathtub, a melon can hold lots and lots of water. Unless the melon's drain is open.

Melon[edit | edit source]

A melon is a unit of measurement in Sweden. Guess how many gallons it is!

WRONG!

The answer was 6.

Water + Melon[edit | edit source]

Do you remember the second Flintstones movie? Boy, that SUCKED! A watermelon can't suck. It is already holding too much water. Did you know that ancient explorers liked watermelon? Some of them had syphilis.

Popular Folklore[edit | edit source]

The classic children's story Falsehoods of an American Pancake talks about watermelons as vehicles for the soul's safe passage into the afterlife. I like to think that these things have little effect on standardized testing.

After the radio had been abolished, Ely Whitney went on to establish the world's first all-melon water stand.

Who stole my melon?![edit | edit source]

WAS IT YOU?!?! I WANT MY DAMN WATER BACK!

Oh[edit | edit source]

It wasn't you? Sorry. I'm just sad; I'm missing 6 gallons of water, and the melon it came in.

Hot Melon Pie[edit | edit source]

You can boil the water in the melon and make it into a birthday cake. Happy birthday melon lovers of the world!

A Pie chart[edit | edit source]

...is a chart with pies in it. That isn't a watermelon! Lets move on.

Twelve?[edit | edit source]

That'd be nearly 72 gallons of water! See, you ARE smart!

You can't eat it.[edit | edit source]

It is just too spicy.