Zombie house

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I miss the days when a leaky roof was the worst of my problems.

My new house has a slight zombie problem

I knew that price was too good to be true.

It just had to be. Sure, the house had problems. The seller was very upfront about that. He spoke at great length about the Indian burial ground in the background, about how the walls had a slight tendency to drip blood, about how my sleep would most likely often be interrupted by the wailing of countless lost souls. But those things just added to the charm. I am a mystery and horror writer after all, so it wasn’t like any of that would discourage me from purchasing the house.

But that was before I knew about the zombies. All the other paranormal problems just add to the charm of the house, but the zombies have proven to a constant nuisance. I simply cannot focus on my writing with them beating down my doors and trying to eat my brains all day and night. I have left messages about it at the real estate office, but they refuse to return my calls.