How to Survive in Kay(f)bop(t)land(p)
Simple phrases for tourists visiting wherever Kay(f)bop(t) is spoken.
Phrases[edit | edit source]
“Hello!”
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“Wab(p)lav(p)bov(p)feb(f)sap(p)sup(f)!”
“Where can I buy a pangolin hat?”
You have to specify a day of the week.
“Where can I buy a pangolin hat on Friday?”
You also have to specify a level of awesomeness.
“Where can I buy a cool pangolin hat on Friday?”
You have to specify how pangolin-shaped it is, in standard deviations.
“Seriously?”
Yes.
“*sigh*...Where can I buy a cool pangolin-shaped (within 1 standard deviation) hat on Friday?”
Oh, a couple more things: you have to specify the price of the hat, as well as how it will die.
“You’re fucking kidding me.”
I am not.
“Where can I buy a cool $2 pangolin-shaped (within 1 standard deviation) hat on Friday, which will die of smoke inhalation?”
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“Vip(t)faf(f)fus(f)bul(p)san(t)fob(f) vap(p)nag(t)cish(t)lus(f)mam(p)nal(t) kay(f)vef(p)lob(p)sus(t)lab(t)kaw(b)peg(f)vlir(t)sang(b)zim(p)vom(b)yam(t)ack(t)vlim(p)point(f)ga(f) ges(b)suw(t)boc(t)ceg(t)bel(p) bom(p)sun(b)fis(f)suf(p)buf(b)lep(p)ga(f) vav(p)shal(t)bop(t)rub(t)kow(p)bel(p)ap(t)vlir(t)sang(b)es(p)u(t)vom(b)jup(f)yam(t)ack(t)vlim(p)dan(f)?”
“You people are fucking crazy!”
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“Vup(b)zhug(f)bub(b)mow(f)vef(f)-kay(f)dan(f)tuw(t)fob(p)san(t)san(t)ap(t)vlir(t)sing(b)es(p)u(t)vom(b)ngo(p)ngo(p)da(t)vlim(p)kay(f)point(f)ga(f) pig(b)we(t)bev(b)lob(b)sob(b)lish(f)vlir(t)sing(b)es(p)zim(p)vom(b)vlim(p)kay(f)vlim(p)ga(f)vlim(p)ga(f) muv(t)vog(p)pop(f)fug(f)baf(f)point(f)ga(f) pol(t)guf(t)fif(b)vu(p)bas(t)vlim(p)ga(f)vlim(p)ga(f)!”
New orthography[edit | edit source]
Some asshole decided to create a new orthography for Kay(f)bop(t), so I have to put new translations. Here we go.
"Hello!"
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"Nunnuuuuunɥuuunnnununɥnunnnnuunuɥununnnnunumuunnnunnnuɥuunuuuunnum!"
"Where can I buy a cool $2 pangolin-shaped (within 1 standard deviation) hat on Friday, which will die of smoke inhalation?"
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"Nnuunuuuunɯuunnnnnunumunnuuunnuumnuuuunnnunɥnuunununnuɯnuuuuunnnum nuuuuuunnnɥnnunnuuunnɯununnnnuunɯuuunnunnuumnnunnuuuunuɥunnnununuuɯ nunuunuunnmuunuunnnnuɥuunuuunuuuɥnnunuuunnnɯuuuunnnnunɯnnunnuunuuuhuunnnunnuumnunuunnuunɯnunuunnunuhnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnɥnunuunnnunhnnnunuununnɯnnnunuunnuuɯnunuunnnnnɥnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnmnnuuununnnm ununnnuuunhnuunuuuuuunɯuunnuunnnnɯnuuunnnnunuɯuuuuunuuunɥ nunnunuuunɥunnunununnhuunuununnumununuuuunnɥuuunnuuuunhuununuunnnɥnnuuununnnm nnunuunuunɥnnunnnnuuuɯnunnnnunnnɯuuununnunnɯnnnunuuuunɥuuuuunuuunɥunuunnnnuuɯnunuunnuunɯnunuunnunuhnunuunnunnɥnunuunnnuuɯnunuunnnunhnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnmnnnunuununnɯnnnunuunnuuɯnunuunnnnnɥnunuununuum?"
"You people are fucking crazy!"
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"Nuuunnuuuuhnnuununuunumnnnuuuunnnhnunuuunnnnumuunuunnnnum-nunuunuunnmnunuununuumnunuunununɯnuuuuunnnuɥnuunununnuɯnuunununnuɯunuunnnnuuɯnunuunnuunɯnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnhnunuunnunnɥnunuunnnuuɯnunuunnnunhnnununnnnnuɥnnununnnnnuɥnunuunnnnuɯnunuunnnnnɥnunuunuunnmnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnmnnuuununnnm unnnnnnnnuhnnnnunnuunɯuuuunnnuunhuunuuunuuuhuunnnuuuunhunnnuunnnumnunuunnuunɯnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnhnunuunnunnɥnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnɥnunuunnnunhnunuunnnnnɥnunuunuunnmnunuunnnnnɥnnuuununnnmnunuunnnnnɥnnuuununnnm nuunuunnunnɯuuuununnuuɥnnunnnnnnnmnuuuunnuunmnuuuuunnuumnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnmnnuuununnnm uuunuuuunnɯunnunnunuuɯuuuuununuuhnnuuunnnuuuɥuunuununuuɯnunuunnnnnɥnnuuununnnmnunuunnnnnɥnnuuununnnm!"