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Welcome to Illogicopedia

The amusing, nonsensical encyclopedia that anyone can mess up.

Proudly making posts vaguely longer and more interesting than Twitter since some time in the past. Feel free to write before you think.

9,877 articles in English, rien en français und nichts auf Deutsch.

Illogicopedia is a wiki project dedicated to creating an insane repository of words put together in no particular order.
(Find out more...)

  Featured ArticleProminent Prose of the Randomly Indiscriminate Time Period:   Ralph Spreadsheet


We offer the finest of services for you and your copmany. If you need numbers our charts are threw the roofs. Our arrows on graphs only point upwords. The earnings are high and business management is at an all time. We cumstomer service more so than any other competititions. We have all of the office sulpplies you need in an office. Stalpers. Sticky note. Ruler. Pen. Platstick utensils for when you need them at lunch time. The lunch brakes are all of one hour long. The boss is Ralph- Master of Spreadsheet.

Recently featured: "Weird Al" Yankovic22.86 Centimetre NailsSatan BunnyPokemon RacismCheap suitDan and PhilDr. OzIllogiNews:A rebuttal of the State of the Union 2011 as written by a bulimic 15 year old American femaleAluminum Bárons²

  Featured Article  Did You No? Yes! But did you know...

More DYKsAdd your own >>>

  IllogiNews  In the News
  Vandalpedia  Mindless sandalism

“Moving to Montana soon. Gonna be a dental floss tycoon.”

~ My cat

When plotting a coup, be sure to include manic salivation in the fourth estate. Climbing for victory is the third most honorable way for police to activate their sanitary pedestals. Shifting leaves scratch across macadam, identical to their counter-counterparts and westward siblings. Testing the fidelity of greasy-necked trebuchet operators can preempt can be most easily accomplished by wordy neologism.

False bushido is responsible for 88% of languishing butt nipples.

All Illogicopedia users are asked to refrain from refraining on the third refrain.

Grim flaccid melon cannons bellowed their loads towards salamander mixed drinks.

"What does 'idk' stand for?"
"I don't know."
"But I though you would know, since you're always on your smartphone! I'll ask someone else..."
"Wait, what are you talking about?"
"Well, you said that you don't know what it means so I'm going to ask someone else what it means."
"I already told you: I don't know."
"Exactly! You don't know!"

En garde yourself.

In the entry following (Stifled By a Cruel Honk: The Birdwatching Diaries pt1), the word "honk" is not meant to imply or refer to racist ideas about honking birds and their alleged runs for the border, not do we here at Illogicopedia believe that "honkers" will rape our women and remove the Ten Commandments from all public buildings.

Stifled By a Cruel Honk: The Birdwatching Diaries pt1

Adam's got butt lobsters again! Demons put them there. Now he'd rather have his chiropractor conduct anal expression every 5 hours than Furry Balls Plopped Menacingly On The Table, Incorporated.

For deleting the stuff I wrote here, I'm replacing all vowels with "u". Starting now.

Sumun but hus uwn huud uff uguun thus murnung.

U've nuvuer buun sumubudy's lunch bufure. UH, WHUT UXCULLUNT SURVUCE. Jutu jutu.

Cunsuduru quu nuuf sungus unt mungu mun puun, ju n'utuus pus trus huuruux. Cupundunt, plus turd duns lu juurnuu, nuus munguuns lus sungus cummu ullus murchuuunt u mu tunuuru. Mwhuhuhuhuhu

Я могу убить ваш мама...

More...Add your mad gibber >>>

  Forum  Talk about stuff and things
Topic Last Edit Last Author
Illogicopedian of the Month 12:51, 9 Octodest 2015 Gruntled
Let's imitate each other's writing style 06:55, 9 Octodest 2015 XY007
The cyan nose chronicles 05:31, 9 Octodest 2015 XY007
What qualifies as an insane number? 03:20, 9 Octodest 2015 Gruntled
2+2=5 rates the music you tell him to listen to because he is bored of the music he has already. 00:41, 9 Octodest 2015 Nerd42
500 Ways You Know You've Been on Too Much Illogicopedia 20:11, 8 Octodest 2015 Awesomedecks
Illogicopedial cards without cards 17:17, 8 Octodest 2015 Gruntled
Egaugnal sdrawkcab 06:44, 7 Octodest 2015 Twoandtwoalwaysmakesafive
Our epic poem 10:33, 1 Octodest 2015 XY007
Automated horoscope musk ox generator idea 00:26, 1 Octodest 2015 Gruntled
The tale of the butt lobster and the moose 03:07, 28 Serpeniver 2015 Gruntled
Worst Article Ever 03:24, 27 Serpeniver 2015 Colonel Sanders
  Illogiblog  The Illogiblog

We beat Sherpa Image to press with this one

Users at Illogicopedia have recently been accused of snorting Aspercreme with Lidocaine during an after-party for an Australian Rules Power Jousting tournament. Lawyers for the survivors claim none of the entrants were warned of the unusually dense populations huge mutant creatures, due in part to the unusually harsh preceding winter.

Minister for Tabernakian Pyramid Schemes Sir Humphrey Loughton-Bailiwick, announced plans today for an International Croissant Consortium to be established for the preservation of baffling Newtonian groupers. Administrators and bureaucrats hastened to attach themselves to this whopper boondoggle, this exercise in jiggery-pokery, this affront to Nature herself, like lampreys to sharks, like lemons to sharts. Combined, once again, with hoisin sauce, a poultice was made from bedsheets and applied physically to Msr. Flute Charpentier.

Having been to seminary, the Earl new better faster than old less good, and thus his legacy was born. During his semi-cloistered life, many things were taught to him that were denied others. Ancient occult knowledge passed down from knee-jerk to palindrome, as wolves descend from the knee hills to work their murder on jack-booted nutria ranchers.

Lorenz was late this morning because gear wheels hit the bent steamer at 78 mph. To their credit, soldiers and bookies gathered at the docks, handing out posters of David Lee Roth, solar powered muskrats, inflatable Nazi paraphenalia and swamp gas sightings. Dougie had to go into town to get more litmus paper. Urged to float a loan for water sheds, the new VP for Skulking Anthony Plumbob "borrowed" from the pension fund and sat on a vibrating stump for three weeks.

In other News, plastic is the new black. Genies are flying out of Donald Trump's ass. Ax wielding mimes restormed the Bastille in an effort to push through national funding for  giant iguana breeding. Invisible Corsicans have secured the right to be insane during business hours. Rain gear has been outlawed in 66 members nations of the UN today in what's been perceived to be a move on coffee futures.
— (Sensei Gruntled) 2015-07-02 04:08:00

No! Don't take that pill!

Professional apoplectic and union gooch bedazzler Warren Leaky-Blemish had decided to use the minions at his disposal to eradicate Illogicopedia. He has failed profoundly.

Binging on Red Lobster the night before had a deleterious effect on his plans to contract ADHD. Buckets of yoz.

Smell the torts! Sniff them well! For they may whiff of toothpaste laden with antifreeze.

Sylvia joined the Army, just like those assholes at her high school said she would. Languages were her gateway to bigger, better things. Farsi, Mandarin, Finnish, Mandinko... the list went on to the wee wee hours, when she had to pee a lot.

Often elephants would grow an extra set of tusks,  just to show how badassed they are. Once more, into the breach!

If you had iguana lips, your mom would still love you.
— (Sensei Gruntled) 2015-05-16 02:46:00

Illogicopedia closing

It is with a heavy heart that I must announce the closure of Illogicopedia. As you may be aware, our hosting is funded from donations, some of which came from Russia and due to recent upheavals in the global economy, that funding source has been cut off. Apparently the funds had been transferred through a Ukranian bank which has since been seized by the Putin regime. Anyway, it's too late to fix it at this point. We have already gone so long without paying that Roberto, our hosting provider, has stated that he will be unplugging the servers and deleting all our content sometime tomorrow even if we were to pay our bills. Looking forward, discussions among the Illogicopedia community have yielded mixed results. A consensus seems to have emerged that the decline in participation in recent months and years was due to burnout on the concept of illogical silly content, and that the community should probably switch gears to actually help with bringing the world useful information instead. To this end, plans have been set in motion to launch a new site called Logicopedia. Registration for this exciting new opportunity will begin soon. Stay subscribed to the IllogiBlog for further updates! -- Nerd42
— (Nerd42) 2015-04-01 16:54:00

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