“Stay thirsty for chicken, my friend.”
Nuns! Free nuns and nunchuck beef grill roast at the Friar's Club! Gilbert Gottfried's eternally golden voice is in flames, actual flames actual size, Don Hertzfeldt if you are reading this I want a chess pizza with Bobby Fischer's brain melded to the crusty ornament named JOB 4004 BC AD, because I have a reason for loving you. Notice: every good boy deserves to die and cannabalize Hannibal with the finest wine my friend for my dinner with Andre the Friendly Giant. Look up, way up, and I'll call Rusty and then I murder Peter Mansbridge in the airport microphone where he friggin' sits/stands/pulsates, I can't tell if it's not Pete! Newscasters are equal to aliens, proven by genii in microscopic nanoscopic hyperworld order beyond the pale cat vomit with T. Gondii inside of it! Go to panic room for further instructions for decoder ring, m8.
I'm afraid our restaurant has a cold potato soup policy. That means we only serve black ties, and occasionally squid. Does that make me a kid now?
- Don't make me repeat myself.
- Don't make me repeat myself.
- Don't make me repeat myself, I am in a right mood.
Metagal indeen. Os poriation of completed gnocchi. See it? The waters.
- Autoerotic asphyxia is the number one cause of awkward funerals.
ENTER SECRET BATSHIT CODE > : xulch
Fiery Alpaca accepted. Enter requested batshit coorelate: mancky
OK. Now go wash the dishes:
If I won the lottery, I'd throw a huge party and maybe even grow two extra pairs of arms. Wait a minute – that's already been done. We have the dole from Centrelink for that anyways.
But why did our protagonist come down with a case of the additional arms? Perhaps she had difficulty handling her clientele.
Alpacarites falling from the skies, hair aflame and screaming!
Insert random symbols here. (Am I doing it right?)
If you're from Teesside and have a minor speech impediment, clap your hands. Dosh dosh.
Beware the gluteus maximus of the Bactrian camel smeller. Lo, for he is a sphincter twitch. I saw that not so much. It wasn't that funny but the iguanas lived on my skin for four-and-a-half years. MINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- —That's not funny.
- —I know. [laughs hysterically again]
I'm glad you find humour in my pain.
NEW HORIZONS IS HERE!!!!!!!
I think we need a new smash-hit article about Pluto.
Axe Cop killed a million bad guys last week at a Kentucky hootenanny. (kaizum me) 11:02, 11 Jumbly 2015 (UTC)
"Sploosh!", says Pam.
We'll tow your car right away, sir. [laughs hysterically]
‡ ERROR IN ANTEDELUVIAN SYNC; Request Sofa No. 2? Y/N?
‡ PLEASE WAIT WHILE RASTA RASTER SYNC; Request Sofa No. 2? Y/N?
‡ FATAL ERROR IN LINGUA FRANCA SECTOR;
‡ Recommend smoking a spliff. Select usage type: [M]EDICAL/[R]ECREATIONAL/[A]CCIDENTAL FISHBOWL _
So, Massachusetts' first marijuana dispensary is officially open for business. And... there's tons of bullshit to deal with. So I guess I'm back to smoking dust bunnies.
- And the band played left.
Manky gits are gathering on our borders. I am The Mank that settles under your rollers
[Ich bin dein geheimer Schmutz] Und verlorenes Metallgeld > ''METALLGELD''> Frank Zappa permutator, correlative to Utility Muffin Research Kitchens:
I am your secret smut and lost metal money
Request Sofa No. 2? <Y/N>
Request Law & Order reruns? <Y/N>
Request Smell? <Y/N>
“Walls, HUUUH. What are they good for? Absolutely nothin'. Except bashing people's heads against.”
- You really talk my language, oh creamed cheese and salmon sandwich.
Mad gibber? I don't know where to start. Perhaps a Ghetto Leprechaun will inspire me to new depps of
'Genre Police' is growing on me. Wherever I walk I make inexplicable siren noises for no reason. Now it's in the top twenty on the charts in Norway. Like, the everything charts. That's reason to be Norwegian #256, with #257 being Dragostea Din Tei.
Well excuse you, I was being sarcastic.
DO YOU LIEK GLADIATOR MOVIES???
I LOVE GLADIATOR MOVIES!!!
Non-negative integers eh? desudesudesudesudesudesudesudesudesu
There's a demon wearing your face.
I dreamed of Mecha-Streisand again. Fairly lurching through sleep states... theta waves, I have a particular affinity for... I shambled along like a drunk trying to find his way home, a slow, staggering pinball surreally bouncing off this lamp post, that that curbstone... until I jolted awake with a buzzer driving my nervous system, in a cold sweat... can't move my neck properly, still... numb hand arrhythmically tapping cadence to nothing... the minds eye still sees the gigantic mechanical monstrosity, Barbara Streisand in its primal state, screaming as it destroys aircraft, soldiers and artillery.
The first annual Coma Patients Open, hosted by the United States Golf Association (USGA), will be held at St. Andrews (Scotland) Thursday through Younts, July 32. We expect y'all will support our favorites in meatspace or watching on television. Our ringer this year will be Gregor
Japan: The Final Frontier. Land of excessively big eyes and voices higher than a two year old girl that sucked 60 canisters of helium. Japan: your pink haired cousin's fantasy. Anywho, can the Ethernet just shut up? We don't have time for her her her HERR DIREKTOR! OH MY JODD IT'S A MUTHERYUKKING BALD PANDA KAWAII DESUU!!!!!!! derp. Join me as i venture deep deep deep into the epiglottis in search of my comrade Rasputin. Lord knows how much "water" he drank... Hey you! Yeah you! YOU! Go buy me a smartphone! But sir I'm a panther see meow meow meow meow. YOU'RE JUST LIKE THE FREAKING ETHERNET GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE HERE HERE HEAR THAT NOYZZZZ? It's the sound, da sweet sweet sownd of da SLAUGHTERHOUSE on a warm summer day down is Mississippi oh ja... Hey guys I'm that filthy guy that assassinated Franz Ferdinand come at me bro bro bro bro row the boat faster you tortoise! I have a meeting with the UN yet here we are stuck on the Thames! THE THAMES! UHBEFHVBHDFYUVGRUYHERUFHEUYVGEYUVGYGVYGVYUEH8nrudnehfmrihc :) yrjsjshry UK i rd hdnfhdkjxmhfjdmhsnf :) douenchfkrj 2HDEYFIERGVUBCY BARBRA STREISAND! Anywho, my mother recently adopted a boy that was raised by wolves deep in the Amazon...only comment we can make is that Mao Zedong has taken a very sudden interest in him... And remember kids: 2+2=5! Bearz...
GUMMI BEARS BABABABA GUMMI BEARS BABABABA GUMMI! YEAH GUMMI! NO IT'S GUMMY SPELL IT RIGHT, MAN! GUMMI/GUMMY BEARZZZ!!! BEARZ BEARZ BEARZ BEARZ BEARZ
I liek bearz.
I just love, love, love buttons! [hyperventilates]
There's been far too much jocularity here. Bugger off.
“I'd have the blueberry if I were you.”
Oh sweet, lovely mink! How we miss your carnivorous ways! We worship your spirit and glue onion rings to our shoes.
TEXT TEXT TEXT! MINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This space is for sandalism only. Stupid pictures, while fine because they are stupid, still have no place here. We want witty banter, or kaizumery of any monopole.
 MyIllogiDatabase> CLEAR "MAINPAGEVANDALISM" OLDER> 10DAYS
Clearing main page vandalism older than 10 days...
Done. Deleted 30738 bytes of nonsense.
Put The Lotion On Its Skin
- by Simone Predatory Lending
- It puts the lotion on its skin,
- Until the hair grows back again.
- My imaginary friend lived inside my blackboard, and I inside my home.
- We kept our distance for a while, but in the end, I drew her in.
- HA! geddit? [shot]
Collections collected collections collectively. Collections
You had to schedule a doctor's appointment about that splinter? Who would be fussed enough to do that? Maybe it's くよくよくん. Hm, that くよくよくん never seems to be of sound mind, does he?
I specifically ordered ten cows for the decorate-a-cow ceremony and all you do is tickle them? What kind of a monster are you?! Please stay away from my children and don't sell them your biography.