IllogiBooks:The U.S. History You Never Learned in School/Bill of Wrongs

From Illogicopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Well, people were afraid of big government taking over their lives.[1] So, Thomas Jefferson decided to create the Bill of Wrongs, to protect basic rights of the citizens.

Amendments[edit | edit source]

Here they are.

First Amendment[edit | edit source]

Congress shall establish atheism as a religion, kill the press for speaking freely, not allow freedom of speech an kill anyone for speaking against government, and petitioning shall induce a death penalty

This basically means that freedom is futile in America.

Second Amendment[edit | edit source]

The right to bear arms shall be kept until Nancy Pelosi takes it away.

A prediction that came true. Guns have been outlawed in America due to partisan politics big aliens.

Third Amendment[edit | edit source]

You will need to quarter soldiers.

Yeah, soldiers need a home too!

Fourth Amendment[edit | edit source]

No more search and seizure without warrants.

You may not look for things or have seizures without a warrant.

Fifth Amendment[edit | edit source]

Criminals are worthless and have no rights to a fair trial.

Self-explanatory

Sixth Amendment[edit | edit source]

Criminals are worthless and have no rights to a fair trial.

Self-explanatory

Seventh Amendment[edit | edit source]

I forgot what that one was.

Eighth Amendment[edit | edit source]

Criminals are worthless and shall have excessive bail and punishment.

Again, Self-explanatory

Ninth Amendment[edit | edit source]

All rights to govern will go to the federal government and states have no rights.

This gives the federal government unlimited rights.

Tenth Amendment[edit | edit source]

No more wrongs will be issued.

The end. No more wrongs.

Eleventh Amendment[edit | edit source]

Not a part of the Bill of wrongs.[2]

Ratification[edit | edit source]

Passed unanimously.[3]

Guided Practice Questions[edit | edit source]

1. Who wrote the Bill of Wrongs?

2. What is the purpose of it?

Answers[edit | edit source]

1. Barney or that kid across the street, can't remember which

2. For the federal government to become just like Britain, whom the freed themselves from.

References[edit | edit source]

  1. Colbert, Stephen Government and You
  2. Norris, Chuck ME LOVE BILL OF WRONGS!
  3. Colbert, Stephen Government and You