Mountains on Crack
Mountains on crack are a religious chant made by the chickens of the caribbean to worship how high the mountains are. Or It's a joke gone wrong either way we shouldn't interfere with it or we'd get hurt.
Where are they found[edit | edit source]
They're a rare species that could either be found in a dark alleyway or in rehab. It's vital for them act in a creepy way so a foreign person would start to film him/her/Hamid. They are usually camouflaged by smearing themselves with some white stuff. They communicate in an Unusual way such as "I'm a real boy", "It's all ogre now" or most common "Where's my fookin strap-on."
How to climb one[edit | edit source]
Please don't. It won't end good for everyone but if you do you're gonna wake up in another's bed while wearing a play toy. So just don't.
How to hunt one[edit | edit source]
Be careful as they could penetrate your belly button with their tip. Don't mix them up with troll mountains as they are also um... how do I say this... ah a cavity of the bottom. You can attract them with cocaine or weed. When one approaches use a secret handshake. This is crucial as it makes you look like my friend Nikola (a cunt.) When he holds a water pistol don't panic. Just disarm him by showing him a wiener or hole. Then magically the police will appear and arrest you both. As cellmates, you will bulk up over the next 5 years and then strike with a sword (when he drops the soap.)
Being one[edit | edit source]
You've finally reached the bottom of the internet. Well Done! Please close the door on your way out.