When I awoke from a coma

If you reload the page, a different scenario comes up. Oooo....

When I awoke from a coma, the first thing that I saw was a poster saying 'Vote Hillary Clinton' lying on my face, which was interesting, since the last memory I know of was me in a car with Bernie Sanders. Hmm...

Anyway, I quickly realised that I no longer had any arms or legs. Quite a surprise, considering that for the 45 years I have had at least something to wave about in boredom. That Hillary Clinton poster? Well, I had to nudge it off my face, which was quite hard due to a large build-up of static electricity. A nurse then abruptly entered my room and told me that I was going to be discharged, without even explaining why I ended up this way. "Come on, up you get." she said. They never gave me a wheelchair, so my only choice was to waddle out of hospital, in a strange sense of fulfillment. I knew that I would spend the next few weeks in the library, scanning newspapers, trying to find out what happened.

Some possible theories as to what occurred:

• I was in a car accident with Bernie Sanders driving the car.
• The campaigning became violent and I had my arms and legs amputated.

Perhaps I never had arms and legs, oh I don't know...