Disney Magic

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Magic used to be in the public domain until it was trademarked by the Walt Disney Corporation in the mid-20th century. It is technically defined as the power of shiny glitter to make things appear and disappear. Contrary to popular belief, (i.e. Mugglism) it is not imaginary but very real. Anyone who says magic is not real is probably a witch and you should BURN THEM!! BURRNN!!!!!!!

Disney uses magic to make all their rides and movies work. Without magic, they would all just be creepy gay people in costumes. Magic is also what makes Walt Disney World a fun, family friendly place to visit, instead of a place where a bunch of creepy gay people work and tell lies to children. Lies!!

In truth, what people truthfully need to truly understand about magic, is that having magic is much better than being a dumb stupid muggle, flying a carpet is better than driving a car, and teleporting with a magic circle is far superior to teleporting with a sciency thingy like in star trek, especially since the latter kills you and just makes a copy of you. Truly.

But 100 years ago science went around bad mouthing magic and making it out to be big pile of cow dung, it did this so it could be the only ones with magic. It didn't want people other than it being able to stop time and stuff, so it took over the universe and magicked the magic away magically. Now we only have what bits of it it wants to let Trickle down to us, which is none. Instead it makes a bunch more science. And evil science that makes us all meaningless like the inevitable great death of the heat universe. At the end of time, the universe will turn into a giant fireball and burn time away, making us all didn't happen, the only way to stop it is to bring magic back so everyone can live forever, otherwise we're doomed to be eaten by the great nothing at the end of everything.

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