Drum kit
A drum kit is a command and control console for drummers. The higher up drums are screens, angled for easy viewing. The floor Toms, named after a guy named Tom, are the computers. The ride cymbals are so named because they are tactically manipulable symbols, used for input/output. The whole setup enables the drummer to monitor important statistics about the operation of the band, such as the health of its beat. In addition, a drum kit can become a drum kite and blast off into the upper atmosphere, should it be necessary.
The story behind the ride cymbals is extremely storied. An inexperienced cymbalist, cymbal-player,... cymbaler, came up to the King of the Band to say he had just been deafened, having forgotten to wear ear-protection while playing the cymbals. In frustration, he threw one of the cymbals which landed exactly on the top of a coat rack and balanced there. The King of the Band paused significantly, and then said, "Let it ride." The ride cymbal was born.
The high-hat is, in actual fact, Kermit the Frog. Other attachments include the pico-drum, which is only audible to dogs, and the sizzle cymbal, which is stimulated by an appropriate accessory.
Fun facts[edit | edit source]
- Drum kits have been banned in some states for assaulting Fourier transforms.
- Drumming is illegal after 10:00 PM in most states (noise pollution), except for Al Obama, where it goes to 11:00.
- Resonance sometimes causes the cymbals to fly off and chop people's heads off, like in Wild Wild Wild West.
- Some drummers enhance their drum kits with bangles and fings.