Full-on Colon

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A Full-on colon is a literary device that can be used to put a break into the middle of a sentence. Essentially, it is used in the same manner as you would a semi-colon, but only when you really really want to ram your clause deep into another one's sentence hole. They are used most often in the morning, just after the grammatist in question has woken up, though this is not always the case. Full-on colons can occur in literature at all times, whether it be at work, in the bath, or during a Loose Women extended daytime special. Many punctuating their sentences with a full-on colon do so in secret, drawing the blinds and using private browsing to ensure that no incriminating session data is stored on their hard drive. If a sentence that requires a full-on colon is not properly dealt with in a manuscript more and more will inevitably start to pop up until eventually the writer can no longer concentrate on the prose, and has to go out back for some alone time.

Full-on colons are not to be confused with a full on colon, which is what happens after 6 burritos, 2 buckets of fries and a side salad. As such, Full-on colons differ from Full on colons in the sense that they exist only on the theoretical plane as a literary device, and also because they are much less likely to leave a nasty brown mess in the toilet.