I'm unhappy with my TV experience

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Excuse me, kind sir. Where can I buy a more superior TV experience?

That's easy: Guck Cable. They have the guckiest plans around, and their veggies can't be beets!

Wow, sounds great. Can't wait. It's fate. (Lol)

Before long, slightly carcinogenic guck is pouring out of Chet's TV set.

This TV experience is good. I can watch all the propaganda highlights on CNN, and the latest reruns. Thanks, Guck Cable!

You're welcome, Chet!

But Guck Cable is actually a wanted fugitive criminal escapee on the run. The next day, he is captured by The 1337 Squadron.

Oh, damn. Now I have to go back to non-HDTV and its correct aspect ratios. Curse you proper law enforcement!

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