IllogiBooks:The Joe Factor
Now the bestseller comedy book in New Australia, USA and The Filipino Empire! "The Joe Factor" is available online here:
Chapter 1: The Guy who is Sad. Why the Deuce am I saying this?[edit | edit source]
'Now, this is a true but funny story. One time, I was putting an advert of being a good Uncyclopedian. And this is what it said:
Right, I need a bunch of funny guys to help me laugh
These are the following things a funny guy has:
- A funny physique
- Some good jokes
- Slapstick-withstanding
Thank you. It's good to have a bunch of people cleaning up the asswipe's work, eh?'
'And I signed: King Joe of the Philippine Empire- I am the REAL dictator!'
Chapter 2: The Copycat[edit | edit source]
'Someone copied me, and this time it said:
Right, I need a fine woman to treat like a goddess.
These fine ladies need to have the following:
- Ladyness
- Class
- Big, big hair
- No man parts
- One of them fridges with the ice thing in the door
- One of them fridges with stuff in it
- Between four and seven toes on each foot
Thank you. It's good to be around so many fine women, eh?'
Chapter 3: The Racist Man[edit | edit source]
'And someone else copied the guy who copied me. Now it said:
Right, I need a a military leader to burn down the British Empire into the ground.
This fine leader need to have the following:
- Leadership
- Many many soldiers
- Many big guns
- Some nuclear weapons
- No English sense of humor
- Major hatred of Monty Python
Thank you. It's good to be around a world that has that many less Brits, eh?'
'"Now it's a discriminating poster. Can I just stab someone who did that for a minute?" I said to myself. So I went down and put the advert up again.'
Chapter 4: The Annoyance[edit | edit source]
'When I came back a day later, another poster was placed on top of mine! Now it said:
Right, I need High Times to send me the two latest issues from me renewing my subscriptions.
This fine magazine needs to have the following:
- Information on the Cannabis Cup
- Advertisements for Bob Marley T-Shirts
- Articles pertaining to the american marijuana legalization movement.
- Much Tie-Dye inspired art.
- Psychedelic colors
- Guide to good weed
Thank you. It's good to be around so many potheads, isn't it? Chocolate Rain 18:11, 11 September 2008 (UTC)
Chapter 5: Illogicopedia[edit | edit source]
I'm home! Finally, I can go write nonsense whatever I like!
THE END