IllogiNews:Spiderman from another dimension startles passersby

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Spiderman from another dimension
Warning! This article contains less than 3 instances of contradiction.

VALENCIA, Oranges -- Despite a complete lack of preparation by civil defense and emergency personnel, the sudden appearance of Spiderman from another dimension in this sleepy Spanish omlet[1] of 956 souls was met with apathy and indifference. A local Roman Catholic archbishop was on hand for the cleanup with a squad of stormtrooper-nuns to assist in organ replacement therapies and to force orphans to believe in the transubstantiation at the moment of the Holy consecration of the communion hosts.

Even the wrath of Cthulhu was sated temporarily by the subtle charms of the bull/super-hero. Ronald Reagan stood out in a sea of black faces, his tarpaulin neatly folded. Prescient fruit bats gathered in the trees above, as if at the behest of some super-being, some supernatural force of nature[2].

Otherwise, nobody noticed. Extradimensional Spiderman just sort of stood there, looking about like a git or something, and nobody noticed. Nope.

Source[edit]

Raccoons told me this story, earlier this evening as they gnawed on my back porch. the author.

  1. Bugger off, spelling nazis
  2. Leave this contradiction alone too, you wanker