Lettuce

Lettuce.

Sitting here on the chopping board.

Silent and brooding. Lonely.

Sad.

Never loved, never praised. Grown with many others and always destined to die at the hands of humans.

Why?

Why are they discriminated? Why are they killed? Why can't humans just-

KNIFE!

WHACK!

Actually, now he looks kind of tasty.

...

Aw, f*** lettuce discrimination rights.

Crunch.

Mmmm.