List of sexually active popes
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This is a list of sexually active popes. That's it, what more did you expect?
i guess i'll just start listing them then[edit | edit source]
| Name | Reign | Relationship(s) | Notes | |||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Pope Popus the Pope | 0-1 | Found a portal gun and proceeded to commit die. | Wait, we had to take notes? Shit. Will this be on the test? | |||
| Pope John LXIX | 1669-1769 | HAHA FUNNY SEX NUMBER LOL | There isn't a test, eediot. | |||
| Pope | Pope | Pop | Fuck you, you broke the chain. Also, when's the test? | |||
| Pope Sixtus VI | 1444-1460 | Börked the Queen of Queens | The test is on Serpeniver 39. Bring plenty of sauce. You'll need all of it. | |||
| Pope Plagueis the Wise | Oh fuck not this | Saved others from death, but not himself. | Did you ever hear the tragedy of Pope Plagueis the Wise? I thought not. It's not a story the Catholics would tell you. It's an Orthodox legend. Pope Plagueis was a Byzantine Emperor, so powerful and so wise he could use the Bible to influence the Jesus juice to create life... He had such a knowledge of the Orthodoxy that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The Orthodox Bible is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic, he could save others from death, but not himself. | |||
| Pope AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA MMCCXXII | 222-2222 | Wait, did you just equate Orthodox Christians to Sith Lords? | Is it possible to learn this power? | |||
| Pope Fiftus V | 5 | Converted to Fifthism | Not from a Catholic. | There must be F I V E | ||
| Pope? Pope. | Hotel? Trivago. | You fucking insolent logician, you stole a box from this row. Now we don't know what was there! | ||||
| Fancy Hat Man #583 | Does it even matter? | knishop | Believe me, there was nothing important there. | |||
| Pope K. Rool | 2000-20001 | Poped his way into obscurity | Couldn't find any documentation. This is why I hate B#. | |||
| Popey McPopeface | "Hey, I get that reference!" | Why in illogia would you make that joke | Yeah, go jj yourself | |||
| Pope ØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØØ IX | 2021-1999 | Was a walrus | I'm bored, anyone up for Uno? | Sure! | ||
| Oh no, not this guy again. | Hey, I thought we told you to fuck off! | Seriously dude, nobody wants you here. | Ignore them. Why don't I just start dealing? | Sounds good. | ||
| *sigh* Whatever. Let's just carry on. Pope Vladimir I | 1917-1924 | Knew how to party | Ok, top card is a blue 5. I'll go first. Green 5. | Wild Draw Four! I choose yellow. Draw four, and then let me draw, because I don't have any yellows. | ||
| Pope Ni--[REDACTED] | Dude wtf | All his speech was slurred after that one night. | Ah, boils. Okay, uh, yellow nine. | Purple nine! | Oh, so that's how you're gonna play? So be it. | Wtf who are you |
| Pope Johann IV | 14-150 | Assumed the pontificate at a tanner's shop | Hey, where are you getting all these boxes? | idk | ||
| Nuts | ||||||
| Hello? Anyone there? | ||||||
| Pope Nope O | 0000000000 | the void... it's so cold... |
That's quite a plethora of porking popes. Pretty pulverizing. Yr.