New York City
|This was written by a native New Yorker, so I'm not trying to be hateful|
Ahh... New York City. A great place. Except the fact that if you fall on the street, people will simply walk on top of you but that's okay.
Location[edit | edit source]
No, it isn't[edit | edit source]
No, New York City is not the capital of New York. That's Albany. Yes, what the hell is Albany, right? It's this place that in no way deserves it's capital-hood. You gonna eat that?
Landmarks[edit | edit source]
Sports[edit | edit source]
In New York City, you can visit many sporting events. The teams that play here are the Yankees, the Muts I mean Mets, the Dicks I mean Knicks, and the Rangers. Yeah... Just drive south to a place called East Rutherford where all of the good and not douchebag New York teams are...
Food[edit | edit source]
Probably the biggest highlight of New York. Of course New York didn't event pizza but they invented sliced pizza. Because eating a pizza whole just seems awkward.
Other Stuff and a Conclusion[edit | edit source]
So if you're visiting New York City, nothing will happen much. You could I don't know, actually see the sights and walk around and see the shitty I mean city. There is Harlem, Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx, and of course there is Staten Island but nothing really happens there other than... I don't really know.
- Pfft. New Jersey
- Which isn't really going inside because it's just a billion stairs just to see a few you can see from your hotel.
- Which luckily has elevators.
- You can be on the Today Show! Yay!
- Which in all reality is just a big place with trees
- Which is out of the list is the only place that's really worth visiting because they have a lot of crap
- *sticks up middle finger*
- Though I am a die-hard Met fan
- Which are only worth watching if your favorite team is in town
- Um... What can I say about them?
- unless of course you get picked up by the Cash Cab
- or call a cab
- advice: PACK HEAT
- Nothing much happens
- If you want too live there for some reason
- To see the Yanks or to play some pick-up basketball and risk getting shot (same advice as Harlem)