Pablo Honey

It appears to be a poor soul who has acquired Pablo Honey.

Wasn't a good enough description for you? Well here goes, then.

Pablo Honey is a form of the Radiohead birth defect in which symptoms occur as follows:

          1. You forget everybody's names, so you address them as "You."
          2. Upon learning that you can't get together with a girl or boy, you think that you're a Creep.
          3. You forget how to do everything and anything, so when you need to do something you ask, "How Do You?"
          4. There are tons of voices in your head that you tell to Stop Whispering.
          5. You develop a paranoid notion that people are always Thinking About You.
          6. You think that Anyone Can Play Guitar.
          7. You start watching the show Ripcord to learn how to skydive.
          8. You think that a tomato is a Vegetable.
          9. Cockiness overcomes you, so people ask you to Prove Yourself.
         10. When asked to do anything, you say, "I Can't."
         11. You are always down with a Lurgee.
         12. You die in a huge Blow Out.

Rarer Symptoms

Being the most unpredictable disease known to rats and children, Radiohead and Pablo Honey tend to have rarer symptoms.

1. Every time you car breaks down, you say, "Stupid Car!"
2. Your thoughts are replaced with the phrase, "There is a phrase Inside My Head."
3. You always wonder when you'll be asked the Million Dollar Question.
4. If anyone asks you if you're president or prime minister, you say, "Yes I Am."
5. You call yourself Faithless The Wonder Boy.
6. Your children are Coke Babies.
7. You listen to Led Zeppelin because you think that Pop Is Dead.
8. Because you are so contagious, you wonder why Nothing Touches Me.

Shared symptoms

Pablo Honey shares a symptom with The Bends: You start to trust only one company: the Banana Co.