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We Spread Youre Sheets
Please Use Ralph Spreadsheet[edit | edit source]
We offer the finest of services for you and your copmany. If you need numbers our charts are threw the roofs. Our arrows on graphs only point upwords. The earnings are high and business management is at an all time. We cumstomer service more so than any other competititions. We have all of the office sulpplies you need in an office. Stalpers. Sticky note. Ruler. Pen. Platstick utensils for when you need them at lunch time. The lunch brakes are all of one hour long. The boss is Ralph- Master of Spreadsheet. His skills in the Microsoft excel are better than yours. He fills in all of the cells and tells us the earnings. The earnings are awlways good. We are proud. We kiss his feet every mornings at 8:00 AM. We work until 5pm. The cubicles are spacious. we warship our lord and saver Ralph. We aslo love and respect Ralph Spreadsheet's right hand mand Michael Paperwork who manages the empoylees on day to day basis. Tell Ralph how much he loves you and you love him and remember to keep numbers high or Ralph will smite you. Fear and respeckt for Ralph (our overlord) are healthy and kind. Without Ralph we are nothing. The only man Ralph does answer to is the alimighty Staniel Database. Little known about Staniel Database, but he crush you. Ralph is is his prophet in whom we trust his guidance. Please where khakis to work and collard shirt. Belt and tie are optional. Jeans OK on friday.
Please consider using are business service today. We do good at what we do. Which is business.
- Sometimes we have a Potlucks- lots of crockpots.
- Weekly Meetings.
- THREE Watercoolers.
- Catering @ Work every third tuesday of the month.
Hail To Ralph Spreadsheet and please forward your phone when you take your lunch brake.