What The Bastarding Hell?
Wow, I didn't see that coming. Seriously, what the bastarding hell?
I Mean, Just Wow[edit | edit source]
Sweet Jesus Christ on a comfortable couch, there are some things that catch you by surprise, there are some things that you just don't see coming, and then there are rollerblading hippos. None of those, however, come close to this. This is some next-level WTF. And when the dust has settled, the penguins have marched past, and my dicker has settled down again, the only question I can reasonably ask is what the bastarding hell?
No Really, What?[edit | edit source]
I so seriously don't get this, man, and I don't know if anything will ever make it clear to me. You could get Stephen Colbert to testify to Congress about it, paint an explanation in neon pink on the side of the White House, actually create a readable Wikipedia article on it... Actually, no, maybe that last one is a bit ridiculous. But even so, you could do pretty much anything, and I'd still have to ask what the bastarding hell?
We Interrupt This Flow Of Whatever To Bring You A Trite Message[edit | edit source]
A bird in the hand is worth a bird in the hand. Thanks for listening.
But, Seriously, Can You Explain This?[edit | edit source]
Because I'd like to see you try. Honestly. It's got me. This whole thing has trampled roughshod across my perception of reality to the point that my sense of perspective is now in my big toenail. If I think about it too much more, there's a strong chance my brain will dribble out of my nipples, and I think we can all agree that would be a bad thing. So yeah, what the bastarding hell?
Oh Wait, I Think I Got It![edit | edit source]
Fuuuuuck! Man, it's so simple when you think about it, right? Wow, that blew my mind for a minute, but I'm on top of it now. It all fits. You just have to look at it from the North, and it clicks! It all falls into pl...
Wait, that doesn't explain the golf club... Or the third dolphin. Nope, I'm still baffled. What the bastarding hell?
I Think I Need A Lie Down[edit | edit source]
Maybe it'll all make sense in the morning. Or maybe it won't, I don't know. I'm not actually sure I know anything any more. Don't bother trying to help, I don't think anyone can any more. And I'm not going to tell you what I'm on about. If you don't get it by now, then you don't know either. You're fucking useless, aren't you?