Bella Thorne

From Illogicopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
She is made entirely out of Skittles.

When you drive your car very fast and someone drops a bucket, that is Bella Thorne.

Early life[edit | edit source]

Putting large chunks of metal together is such a difficult task that it often causes the hands to shake in such a way as to make music like a violin. Bella invented a type of glue in order to reduce the number of telephones in the world, but one young woman from Florida can only do so much before her back breaks and she can no longer tell left from right. It is with a heavy heart that Bella remembers all the times that she tried to drink lemons and failed miserably at it. She is talented at dancing and reading books about seawater.

Professional life[edit | edit source]

Bella wanted to go to college to study the lost art of the bathtub. The bathtub had always been her favorite piece of equipment. Helping herself to yet another slice of cake, Bella remembers a time when only the homeless were allowed to vote for the person most likely to dream about cheesecakes. New York has always been happy to visit Bella whenever she is sick and at the hospital. Sadly, the same can not be said for the city of Chicago, which has time and time again refused to allowed small dogs to wear coats and pretend to be bigger dogs.

Personal life[edit | edit source]

Your trip to the kitchen will never be complete unless you make sure to dust the sugar off Bella Thorne. She looks her best in candlelight, but the night can only stretch out so far until the day becomes jealous and threatens to move away. She talks to her computer and her computer talks to God. That is how she is able to obtain all the best reports on the history of ancient soda. Bella can only understand things that have been written backwards, unless she is standing on her head at the bowling alley. You once dreamed about her, but that was actually a flamingo.