Bzinky Mertin

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Bzinky Mertin is a jolly old mountain elf (some say troll) who pretends to be an accountant but only on first Thursdays of months which have 28 days in which presidential elections do not occur and seventh Fridays of months for which x modulo y = 1, with x being the number of the current year and y being the number of the current month. The number of the current year is usually reckoned using the Gregorian calendar, but when Bzinky's age is a prime number, the Jewish calendar is used instead.

Bzinky Mertin and gender[edit]

Bzinky's name is Bzinky. Bzinky doesn't understand why some silly people seem to think that Bzinky's name is actually "She" or "He" or "Tzargleblrmphatha"[1]. Kind of like Mokona from tSUbAsA ResERvOIr cHrONiCLe which is a Japanese comic books that I read when I was younger.

Pictures of Bzinky Mertin[edit]

It should be noted that these are all artists' depictions of Bzinky, who either had never seen Bzinky and knew of Bzinky's appearance only by second- or third-hand testimonies, and/or employed unusual methods of painting. Due to these factors, these pictures' utility in aiding identification of Bzinky Mertin by appearance may prove limited.

2013-era P00psicle was here!!1[edit]

more than 800 sexual intercourse


  1. Actually, the only person who calls Bzinky that is Yog-Sockpuppet.